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    Cook with me - Pasta 'n' Sauce edition

    Mhmmm Cheese and Broccoli...

    45w ago

    2.4K

    Welcome to something a little different and a little disturbing. Today I treated myself to a very exquisite Pasta 'n' Sauce dish. I chose this because I really like cheese and broccoli, not the fact it was reduced to 50p for reasons which we will not go in to.

    And yes before you ask, I am a uni student studying at the profound and exquisite University of Lincoln. While it may not be one of the country’s most prestigious ones such as Oxford, Cambridge and Hull it still does the job. Only joking, Cambridge is a pile of horse radish.

    As you can see, this meal supposedly takes just 5 minutes to cook which turns out to be complete baloney as it took me the best part of 25 minutes once I had figured out what a hob was and why it wasn't in my biscuit tin.

    Once I had poured the 250ml of water in the pan along with the 100ml of milk I came across a bit of a problem, I didn't have a spoon. Or atleast, didn't have one which wasn't covered in a sticky substance I made using lemon juice and sugar to make homemade waxing strips. This is another reason why my white t-shirt is now red.

    Anyway, I found one which was clean, even if it wasn't mine and began to stir. I let this horrible liquid boil but then realised there was odd black bits in it. It turned out my pan was broken and dissolving into my pasta but alas, this was the least of my worries. It then proceeded to boil over which meant I had a big mess on my hands. I will aim to clean that up within the next 5-10 working days.

    I then added the pasta and powdered mixture and was greeted by the most god awful smell imaginable to man. It was a truly vile stench of old feet and stale vegetable, but then I remembered I had taken my socks off while stirring and had hung them up next to the extractor fan. All was well again.

    Once the pasta was sort of ready, it was still a little rough around the edges and lumpy, I poured it into my bowl and voila, I had an incredibly clumpy, liquidy and hard pasta dish. I then proceeded to burn my mouth on this incredibly hot dish before spilling most of it down myself. Result.

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    Comments (8)

    • You worked hard for this meal, you should be proud! When I was in university, I just starved from lack of effort lol (not advised)

        10 months ago
    • What a story of culinary delight and tasty temptations to wake up to. At least I now know that I will probably not have any form of appetite today. Thanks for that 🙄 at least i had a laugh reading it!

        10 months ago
    • Hey, fellow student here and I’ve literally just ate the macaroni cheese version of this but i really like the cheese and broccoli one too. The secret is to what the whole lot it the microding. None of this pots on the job malarkey

        10 months ago
    • Why was it reduced to 50p?

        10 months ago
    • Lol..oh my goodness! Im not sure I want to know about the homemade waxing strips.

        10 months ago
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