Turns out preserving one's self as a Heinz spaghetti shape is something easily done; immortality IS cheap.
Regarding James May's post from no less than 24 days ago, he claimed he "wanted to be remembered", specifically in the form of a fantasy tinned product "Heinz Bims". I immediately claimed that I could fulfil this man's dream of preserving his own image in a tin of what would essentially be some tomato pasta Bim heads. I mean how hard could it be?
Quite difficult actually. The problem being, how on earth is anyone supposed to replicate someone's face that small and be able to to imprint it on some flimsy carbohydrate snack? Well, I searched within the crevices of the deep, dark oblivion we call "the internet", and found the most elegent, affordable solution.
A custom-faced wood branding iron - ordered and made from a company that designs these tools for imprinting business logos on timber and other miscellaneous materials.
Borderline genius.
It only arrived today, but I was able to make a few mock prototypes, which genuinely do not look THAT bad, given the thought process and the overall absurdity of the idea.
So stay tuned; these may well appear on your slices of toast in the future.
**Note: When I'm done with this "project", I have no reason to keep this branding iron, so if you want it for the purposes of graffiti, to give your mates a surprise James May tattoo or to use as a tremendous centerpiece, drop me a message; you can have it.**
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Comments (13)
Well I'd take a free branding iron any day...
Who wouldn't, you know?
He probably practiced those moves every day in the mirror for years, waiting for his moment to shine
Hahahaha I am sure of it!
very fun, can't wait to see a Tin o Bim...will there be cheeeese too :)
Why go without?
Update: there was indeed cheese
Hahahaha hahahahaha that is epic Beans!!! It’s pretty accurate and I call dibs
Hahaha cheers 😂 it's yours
James May dance
If James had it, who he brand first?
Hammond or Clarkson 🤣
That's a very good question