How to steal a Brigadeiro and get away with it

4w ago

6.7K

Chances are you have a Brazilian in your life, but in case you don't, here's all you need to know: they are loud, passionate, sneaky, dramatic, but amazingly friendly. Even the mellowest of the Brazilians show these characteristics, no matter where they are in the world and what they've been through... and I have a theory.

It all starts with the Brigadeiro.

Brazilians love to throw small theme parties for their kids. They invite distant family, school friends, and neighbours, assemble a few tables covered with finger foods, put some superhero decoration up, and boom, it's a party - but don't touch the Brigadeiro!

PATRICIA, 4 YEARS OLD, BRIGADEIRO BURGLAR

It takes a lot of skill to steal a Brigadeiro from the cake table without being noticed, as everyone is waiting for the host to allow everyone to eat the "docinhos" - little desserts. It's a known fact that once the first is eaten and noticed, all of them will be taken in a matter of minutes.

The trick is to wait for a distraction: your drunk uncle will drop his beer bottle, your cousins will scream the name of their favourite football/soccer team, and your aunt will promptly apologize to the host while she helps her clean - all at once, because that's what Brazilians do. That's your moment. Grab a brigadeiro, run, and hide. Grab one from the corners or from a position you won't need to worry about reassembling the line. You crime needs to go unnoticed so you can commit it again.

Make sure you work alone. Don't trust anyone - they will ask you to share. Dispose the paper liner wisely and never forget them in your pockets or your crime will chase you once your mom does the laundry.

I DON'T WANT TO BE A CRIMINAL, CAN I STILL EAT BRIGADEIRO?

Yes, you can. You can fight for one once the host allows dessert consumption. You can also do like me, recovered criminal, and cook your own.

Warning: brigadeiro is highly addictive. Try it at your own risk.

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