Why you need a dishwasher in your life

I'll have none of the 'BUT I ENJOY WASHING DISHES' because that isn't natural.

30w ago

The worst part of any enjoyable thing in life is the clean-up.

It was true when we scattered LEGO around the place building the UNIVERSE’S ULTIMATE SPACESHIP WITH THE BIGGEST GUNS, which was then also scattered around the place because impossibly, your big brother’s spaceship was more ultimate and had bigger guns.

It was true when we had a huge waterfight, and instead of accepting that they will perish into the soil within a week, the parents insisted that all 3,084 detonated waterbombs need to be recovered from the lawn and put in the bin.

And it’s especially true in cooking. You’re at your creative zenith, blending stuff, sifting stuff, throwing clouds of cocoa powder into the air, pouring choc chips all over the bench and onto the floor, and it’s a blast. You’re an artist. Nothing else matters but the art. But at the back of your mind you know you’re making a huge mess and there’ll be a commensurately huge clean-up. Every utensil you whisk musically out the drawer and plunge into the flour is going to be one in the sink.

Which is exactly why you need a dishwasher. It is to cooking what running water was to painting. It means that everything can be scooped up, thrown into a machine, and forgotten about. Of course, with a household dishwasher comes a household dishwasher pedant, the guy who insists to death things must be stacked just so if they’re to clean, but speaking from experience here, if you add enough concentrate and turn it to Intensive, nothing can go wrong.

Besides, it’s also bigger than the dishrack, so one big cook-up and the resultant dinner’s dishes isn’t going to cram it. It’s when, with your newfound laziness, you keep adding the dishes of multiple meals before putting it on its cycle that things get a bit congested.

The Smug, for that is its effect. Also I don't remember this picture looking this blurry on the tablet.

The Smug, for that is its effect. Also I don't remember this picture looking this blurry on the tablet.

I will mention there are a couple of rules. Not everything is dishwasher safe. If you’ve got things like common mugs that say they’re not dishwasher safe, I’d suggest they’re rubbish and you’re better off without them. However, I have fetched crystal from the bottom of the dishwasher before so I wouldn’t recommend putting the wine glasses through a cycle. You’ve also got to check the propellers have an uninterrupted revolution – if you turn on the machine and then hear odd sounds, a knife is probably trying to hold back the propeller.

That’s it. There’s more rules and maintenance involved in using a toaster, an appliance which has nothing on the life-changing usefulness of the dishwasher, yet one which everyone seems to think they need.

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Comments (52)

  • No. NEVER-EVER it will enter my kitchen!

      7 months ago
    • What is this, Tejas, a hand-washing cult?

        7 months ago
    • It’s no cult, it’s the truth. A dishwasher shall never enter my kitchen

        7 months ago
  • I would cry if I didn’t have mine.

      7 months ago
  • I bought an entire cookware set that ended up not being dishwasher safe, and I regret not returning it. We're moving this summer and the house doesn't have a dishwasher. To fit one in, the entire kitchen would need to be redone, so guess what? The entire kitchen is being redone 😁

      7 months ago
  • Not to mention its indispensable when cooking barbecue ribs and chicken! Seal your chicken or ribs in a ziploc baggie with a little barbecue sauce and run through a cycle on the top rack of the dishwasher (No soap of course) then finish cooking on grill as usual. Cuts cooking time in half and the meat is juicy and tender. 😁

      7 months ago
  • But... I like washing dishes 🤣

      7 months ago