- Jonathan J Castello on Unsplash

You're starting a restaurant. What's it called? What's the cuisine? What music am I hearing?

So it mightn't be the ideal time to start a restaurant, but in expectation of the day when we won't think twice about such a question -

41w ago

Personally, I’m of the leaning that there’s no such thing as a pointless argument - the argument is the point. It was in this spirit that I and another Aussie bloke found ourselves this week arguing pointlessly about what our respective restaurants would look like.

He went for something quite high-brow and Jamaican, with a fantastic (I didn’t admit this) burger menu, called OddJob. I retorted with a cocktail dress option across the road, 'Death of the Highwayman' – a name senselessly coined from two classic English poems, The Death of the Hired Hand, and The Highwayman. It then degenerated into pure troll, because I told him I’d serve up endangered species.

However, it was fun. Which is exactly why I’m here, putting it to you - if you're starting up a restaurant, 1) what's it called? 2) what’s on the menu? 3) what’s the vibe - what's playing in the background?

Go on, it’s better to be weird than boring.

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Comments (50)

  • Bitch Better Have My Steak.

    And classic rock. 24/7. ✊🏾😂😂

      9 months ago
  • So my dream restaurant is called The Gasser. I know! It doesn't sound like an attractive name for an eatery, but hang on there.

    The restaurant would be in an old service station, complete with bay doors. There would be rockabilly music, ol' skool hot rod stuff everywhere, and live music. The menu would consist of greasy burgers, specialty topped fries and tater tots, and good short order food.


    ...a gasser is an ol' skool 1960's style of drag racer. Imagine Big Daddy Ed Roth style hot rod with a "nose bleed" stance. The sign out front would have a gasser on it blowing flames out of the exhaust!

      9 months ago
  • Being a southern girl, mine would be a BBQ/traditional southern food place. Live crooners on Friday and Saturday nights, other times it's music of the 60s. Muscle cars on the walls. It's called Ellie's, after my late mother.

      9 months ago
    • I want to eat there.

        9 months ago
    • Good place to stop in for dinner on a road trip I reckon. Saturday night of course.

        9 months ago
  • Cheap burgers with nice sauces, but processed cheese as 'real' cheese is just shit on a burger.

    Skinny fries.

    As for the layout, simple tables and benches, nothing too comfortable , but rustic looking. Easy to clean.

    Solid floor, but soft wall hangings to absorb noise. Decent extractor fan but again, a quiet one.

    Decent waiting staff.

    No alcohol.

    Have I just described a Burger King? It would be nicer.

      9 months ago
  • I would have a diner, I don't have a name yet, but I would have a different theme each night. So no set menu. So music would probably have to vary as well. So name suggestions are welcome along with any themes you would like to see.

      9 months ago
    • I was sure you were going to suggest a restaurant that only served up hot and jalapenoed food. I even had a name ready - FIRE IN THE HOUSE.

        9 months ago